When I was young, I always felt like I was late to the show. Everyone else knew how to act, but I missed the intro. I wasn’t there for the explanation. I missed the training. I didn’t fit in, and I hated me.
If you have ever attended a 12-step fellowship like Alcoholic Anonymous, no doubt you will have heard sentiments similar to this. My solution, like many others, was to escape through alcohol and drugs. Now, this was not a very good ‘solution.’ I put myself in grave danger and was harmed in many ways.
Now, I am confronted with a young person who feels like I did when I was a teenager. She looks to me for guidance and comfort and help. I can tell her that I understand, but I do not have a solution for her.
I had to go through years of an incredibly painful life until, by the grace of God, I was able to find achieve sobriety. I was given the manual (the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous), asked for help from a trusted friend who had ‘been there,’ and started my journey to sanity and serenity via the 12 steps. That is not a path I would wish on anyone, but it is the only one I know.
I wish I could take a scoop of my faith and trust and give it to this beautiful young woman. I wish I could be like Jesus, lay my hand upon her head, and see her be filled with light and love.
When someone is in the pit of depression, how can we help them? This is my angst of today. I know that everything will work out OK, but how can I give that gift to someone else? I can’t. I feel like I should give her some kind of practical advice, but everything I say falls flat because it is my solution, not her solution.
I guess I only have on choice: praying for her. I pray that her higher power can reach her and ignite that spark in her soul. I pray God works through my words and actions to help ease suffering. This is the way I can at least bring peace to my own soul.